Dark thoughts 

Please do not read if you are if a sensitive nature, it covers topics that aren’t suitable for everyone

Something I’ve found that I am always very prone to are dark thoughts. 

I mean at least once a day, suicide enters my mind. Not just briefly. But with serious thought. How I would do it, where, what I’d write in the note, who I’d want contacted. Serious thought.

I don’t trust myself to have painkillers of any kind in my home. 

It worries me. Deeply. I don’t know how to deal with it. It’s like a darkness that clouds me, follows me, is never far from my mind. 

It’s scary. I’m scared, that one day soon, my thoughts will become actions.

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